Hey Baby Girl!

Baby Girl Wilson

8.23.07

OK, so I was totally wrong. Wrong about the babe being a boy, wrong about being scared of girls, and wrong about wanting a boy!

When the technician said, "we'll it's very obviously a girl" (I spared the little one by not sharing the x-rated photo)...

it just felt right.

"Hello!"

I couldn't even look at Blaine on my left side because of the tears streaming down my right side as we watched the little 1 pound baby GIRL move around on screen. After a while, he poked my side & gave me a whispered & half-hearted "I told you so".



We were both just so amazed at the details we could see of our little GIRL. We could see the heart valves opening and closing...brain details...her hands moving around (I couldn't even feel it!)...her kidneys...and of course her (cough) nether-regions.

Little Feet

Tomorrow is the big day!

Hola people!

So tomorrow is the big ultrasound-to-find-out-the-sex-of-the-baby day!

Here's my thoughts on boy or girl:

I think it will be a boy. Or do I just hope for a boy? Who knows? I just always imagined myself as a mom to 3 or 4 boys. Maybe it is just to make up for my life full of girls/women. Lord knows I have enough girl drama in my life as it is. Girls are just so much drama - I should know, because I am one! There is always hurt feelings and major overtures. Boys just get mad then move on with life. That's one thing I envy Blaine. We fight and he's totally fine in the morning. I am the one who stews and doesn't sleep all night.

So that's that. I'm scared my daugter will be just like me! But, that pretty much guarantees that God wants me to grow through the experience of being mom to a girl.

Blaine thinks it will be a girl. His reasons for everything are much more simple: he just thinks it.

(see how boys are easier than girls?)

We'll update everyone tomorrow.

New New New

Parker John Evans

Born August 3rd, 2007

8:07 am

6 pounds, 15 ounces

I was SHOCKED when I first glanced at Parker. He looked just like us! I can't tell you exactly which of his features was most "Cheatham", but the overall look was pure Amanda. Normally, I just think all babies are identical. In truth, most of them are. but looking at Parker was like looking into a mirror or something!

Something special I share with him is the dimple in his chin. Neither his mom or dad have it. Just me & him.

When I heard of Amanda's first couple signs of going into labor I drove right up to Fairfield. Good thing, too. I was able to stay with Trevor while Amanda & Brian went to the hospital. I just love hanging out with Trevor. he was in a great mood the whole time, and just wanted to play, play, play. His laugh is so infectious!

This photo is my fav. He has this great smirk on his face, like he's either about to challenge you or he's about to be really funny. Either way, he wants your attention. It's great.

I think Blaine & I will try to go up so he can meet Parker next weekend. Um, Amanda is that OK with you? I just am inviting myself!

Now here is my last Wednesday Belly Picture.

Please ignore the furry hair. We were getting ready for bed & almost forgot about the weekly ritual. I'm not sure if you can tell, but my belly is actually sticking out a bit now! It is impossible to suck in, wear normal clothes, or wear pregnancy clothes. I swear I wear some stretchy PJ shorts and a different color tank top every day. It is all I can manage!

As for movement, I really have no idea if I feel gassy, or bloated, or baby. Everyone uses the term "fluttering" to describe the baby's first motions, but I just feet cramps. They feel just like menstrual cramps. Every day my muscles, tendons, uterus, and other stuff must be stretching and moving, because I can sure feel that!

My mood swing indicator is on: EXCITED this week. I am not worried too much about being a terrible mom and leaving my kid on the hood of the car this week. This is mostly thanks to Trevor and Jodi. I obviously love my neices & nephews. They light up my day & I love to play with them. Trevor helped me to be excited about caring for my own child.

Then, Jodi sent me a little birthday thank-you card with the nicest sentiment on it: she said "I continue to be impressed with your patience and care with Trevor - you are going to be such a great mom!" Even now I am getting a little choked up about how nice that was of her.

So, thank you Jodi, Trevor, and of course Mr. Baby Excitement himself - Blaine. I am growing in confidence with your support.

Fine, here's my 16 week photo already!

Week 15

Week 16

Yes, yes... I pretty much look exactly the same every week.

This is really OK.



Life Update:

• Amanda is due any day now.
• Jodi is preggo with IDENTICAL twins (due: beginning of Feb '08).
• Amy is now pregnant & due March 20-something.
• Kylie is NOT PREGNANT.
• Burt....don't even think about it.
• our house has not yet sold, although people still look at it once a week or two.
• Blaine is back from his trip to St. Louis for business.
• The kids in Soledad go back to school in 3 weeks :)
• Maybe then I will have some time to post on this blog more often (or anything else for that matter).

I might as well just get something off my chest. It is not as though anyone reads this thing anyhow... this thing is definitely more like therapy for me.

I digress.

My sister Amy did not call me back 2 months ago when I left her a message that I am pregnant. She did not call me to announce her pregnancy on Friday. She hates me. She writes me hate letters. She actually wrote a compare and contrast essay about me & the devil in high school... and kept it. She acuses me of not being compassionate. She highlights only my flaws of bluntness and brutal honesty. She hates me. She will not respond to my repeated attempts at amendment. Did I mention that she hates me?

I have a real hard time with this. Some people in my life tell me that I should write her off. They say that there are toxic people out there that only wish to accuse and never take any blame in a situation. They say that move on with my life as though I have only 3 sisters. I just can't.

In the meantime, I hurt. I know this is her plan. She wants me to hurt as much as my blunt words have hurt her in the past.

It is working.

I hurt.

I am sorry. I have tried to work on my compassion. I am definitely a better person than I was 10 years ago when I lived with her last. I am a better person than 6 years ago when I last lived in the same state as her. I am a better person still than I was last year when I told her the truth instead of offering a symathetic ear.

And yet she lives her life each day winning the battle of whom is hurting who. She intentionally doles out this painful hatred.

I wish I could say I am above it and it does not effect me.

But it does.

I know we will never be best friends. I know I will never be the kind of person who responds to the fishing-for-a-compliment complaint of "I'm fat" with a kindly "oh, no, you are very thin". I am more likely to say "then stop eating so much". I won't be able to change completely, but I can learn to keep my mouth shut (then why did I type this long blog post?).

I'm still a work in progress...

12 Weeks

Here is my belly at 12 weeks. I am telling you, I feel different this week. I don't think I look that different, but I feel my belly hanging over my pants. My you-know-whats are also spilling over. The changes in my body are not bringing out cozy mothering feelings. Instead, I am worried over the life take-over that will be this child! I am so worried about losing my identity as an individual. I realize that these fears are completely selfish. I realize that I should probably keep my mouth shut. I realize that my poor child will think I don't love it. BUT... I am scared!

It is kind of like the identity change I went through after getting married. I changed my name. MY OWN NAME! I wasn't even ME anymore! Very weird. I mean I made the choice to get married. I made the choice to change my name. I just didn't realize the effect I would experience.

Now I am feeling similar. I won't even be Stacey WILSON now. I will be "Timmy's Mom". Or some-such thing.

Don't worry, I will be back to excited next week. I just have this selfish moment that I need to write down in order to move through it. I don't really do "bottled up".

12 weeks tomorrow!!

May 14, 2007

Here is my 6 week & 5 day photo - taken after our first doctor visit. I was ecstatic!! This was the day that we called everyone and told them. It was KILLING me for the nine days that I knew and couldn't say anything! When that ultrasound was floating around all blurry I was just curious, and then... there was this major pumping going on_____ it was the baby's heartbeat!!!!! I was totally crying, then the lady turned on the sound and we HEARD it! That thing was not even a centimeter, but had a heartbeat. That's it, I turned into blubber....

June 13, 2007

This is 11 weeks - not much difference! Although last week I was wondering how my baby can be growing if I am not, I am now perfectly content with not showing just yet. This weekend we saw my sister Amanda at the Tjerrild Family Picnic at Bass Lake. Girl has 7 weeks to go, but appears to be ready to explode!

At any rate, I am going to try to be patient for this kid - no matter what I do it won't be here for a while anyway.

Peace.

Live from Soledad....It's Monday Night!

Well, I am back from Denmark!


(Photo of my mom & Karin - who we stayed with most of the trip).





Ok, so I've been back for two entire months.





GIVE ME A BREAK! They have been really busy months:





April:

• Reopened the Soledad Pool


• Had surgery on my shoulder


• Taught a lifeguard training class


• Went away with Blaine for the weekend


• Found out I am PREGNANT!

May:

• Eat everything in sight


• Cry at every song on the radio


• Daydream about napping


• Lay awake at night hoping my boobs fall off


• Anxiously await my next doctor's appointment
• List our house for sale: www.573desertstar.com

Now that it is June 4th, I am still feeling like I was in the entire month of May (I thought it was the "merry, merry month of May"?).

The good news is that I have been very busy at work. (Therefore not focusing too much on the ticking clock or my preggo symptoms). I am really excited to be meeting my personal goal of adding two new programs each year. This year I am actually adding many more: Girls' Softball, Track Team, Summer Concert Series, Summer Craft Series, and Flag Football. Additionally, next week we launch our new website: www.soledadrec.com. Check it out to see everything that is "happening in Soledad" (I know that is cheezy, but I love the catchphrase!)

Hope all is well in your neck of the woods. Check in often, because I will post photos of my pregnant belly (or lack of it right now) and more photos of the kid after the next ultrasound (June 26th).

Here's to Wilson Baby #1 - 10 weeks along on Wednesday!